That's right, that's the sum of it, that's how it was. I met Jason twenty years ago, under the strangest of circumstances. He came from Kalgoorlie, Western Australia. Kalgoorlie is a gold mining town in the middle of the Australian desert. Legalized Brothels, naked women dancing on bars and gold, lots of gold. Nothing ever happens there, sand gets in everything and life continues at a slow, almost crawling pace. This was Jason's home. He always dreamed of leaving the outback at some stage in his life.
Shortly before Jason came to The UK, a friend of his Gary, died in a car accident. They were like brothers. Jason was an only child, and as all only children do, he craved the company of others. Gary, was his brother, in all but name. They were close, very close, did everything together and had an unbreakable bond!
I am now going to make an assumption here, because believe it or not, Jason and I have not discussed, how he came out the other side.
If it is anything like me, something snaps inside, and we finally remove ourselves from the path of self destruction, as Jason did.
Sometimes getting our lives on track, are just not enough, after major life changing events and we crave something else. Jason was no exception.
He was working for The West Australian Water Authority, as a surveyor. This involved long journeys through the less favourable parts of Western Australia, for long periods at a time. Since Jason was already becoming board and disheartened with his life, as it stood, it was only a matter of time before things changed.
When Jason made the decision to sell up everything he owned and travel, the choice about where to go, was really never his. His late friend Gary, would make that choice for him.
Gary was English. His family had come from The UK, and he was British in every way. This was the main reason, the two of them got on, his Englishness, the fact he wasn't from Australia and the bond they formed between them in younger days!
Jason sold his Celica and gathered enough funds together to finance his trip to Europe. I do remember talking to Jason on several occasions about his first reactions to living and working in England. The words he used were freedom and feeling liberated. The small town boy moved to the big smoke, and he loved it!
Jason and myself started our relationship in The UK, on 22 September 1995, We married on 22 September 2015, 20 years to the day, after our relationship began!
Gary, sadly died in a car accident. Jason was shattered. His closest, dearest friend had died and he felt alone. More alone than he had ever felt before.
As teenagers, both Gary and Jason had always talked about traveling. They had fallen out of love with Australia, the World was a big place and they wanted to fulfill their dreams and aspire to new adventures, away from the Australian desert.
When Gary died, any decisions were put on hold. Grieving for his friend, Jason fell apart. All of us have periods in our lives, when things just do not work out as they are supposed to. We put life on the back burner and press that button marked self destruct, heading in a downward spiral of regret, feeling sorry for ones self and have an inability to see through the pain of death!
Now here I am going to use some artistic license, as a writer and someone who has been in a relationship with Jason for twenty years, because Jason has never told me of the moment he decided to up and leave Australia and do remember I am writing things down, as I remember them. They may not be completely accurate, neither are they totally inaccurate!
Something snapped inside, things had finally reached breaking point. A combination of memories, family and feeling trapped had taken its course, Jason just wanted to leave, travel and see the World. It was the right time to do it. Nothing was working out properly and it was time to move on!
Jason had a red Celica car, he had bought on a whim, he would sell the car, which would give him quite a few thousand Dollars, to finance his trip, but where would he go? When you live in a relatively isolated community, other places can feel distant. Jason knew very little about the World back then, only what he had read in books and magazines. When weighing up the pro's and con's of where to go, there would be one underlying factor, that would decide his fate for him!
Darren Vranjes, 43 years old, gay, partnered 20 years. Living in Southampton UK. Bipolar!